Midnight Plight

I’m not one for long flights in the first place, but this one has been especially difficult.  You see, currently I am flying to Vienna, Austria, a 9 hour flight from Washington D.C.  As I write this, it is 9:00 pm Utah time.  I left my house at 4 a.m. this morning and I still have 4 hours on this plane.  Justifiably, I’m pretty tired and uncomfortable.  I’m ready for this travel day to be over.  Normally I would just try to sleep (maybe pop in a sleeping pill), but I’m in a bit of predicament.

I have to go to the bathroom, and the guy between the aisle and me won’t wake up.

I’m not on the verge of wetting my pants (yet), but I have to go just enough that I can't sleep.  I’m also nervous that if I don’t go soon, the seat belt light will come on for turbulence, and I will be stuck with a full bladder.  So, I’m on edge trying to figure out how to get out of here.  Here is what I have tried:

·           Tapping him on the shoulder

·           Turning on my reading light

·           Making my computer “accidentally” make noise

·           Tapping him on the shoulder

·           Standing up (so I am essentially ‘hovering’ over him—like a creeper)

·           Turning my computer up to a blinding brightness level

·           Talking to him

·           Tapping him on the shoulder

Obviously, none of my tactics have worked or I wouldn’t be writing this.  I’m SO tempted to just step over him, but there are a few problems with this: I am in a skirt, he has very long legs, I just don’t have the space to take a giant step over him. Also his hands are in his lap, and I am afraid that if I startle him they might go up my skirt or something, and that would be beyond awkward.  This guy is some Associate Dean at John Hopkins, and he’s read like 7 newspapers since the flight started, so he doesn’t seem like the guy that would be okay waking up with a college girl in his lap.  He also doesn’t seem like the type of guy that wakes up.  EVER.

So here I sit, waiting until I can no longer stand it and I have to shake him by the shoulders like there is a terrorist on the plane.  I seriously keep looking over at him every sentence to see if he is showing ANY sign of life.  I don’t know how much longer I can handle this.  I wish I hadn’t downed that water bottle with my disgusting airplane dinner (pasta carbonara—terrible idea).

Also, the woman in the seat in front of me stole my pillow.  Don’t worry, not like a pillow I brought from home or anything, but the little red pillow provided by Austrian Airlines.  She is using TWO as she’s lying against the oval window.  Surely she must know that the airlines only gave her one?  She had to reach down behind her chair to grab it, so I really don’t know why she thinks she can use it.  I just had it sitting there while I was trying to wake up Mr. Neck Pillow.

Oh gosh, I don’t think I can hold this much longer.  Maybe one of the stewardesses all in red can come help me.

OH, HE MOVED.  I’m OUTTA here!!

I’m back.  Crisis averted.  Airplane bathrooms are gross.

On a separate note:  while this blog was created to host photos for my photography class, I have decided it is just going to be my all things Vienna blog.  That way, when the summer ends, I can just print it all off into a neat little book, and not have to worry about keeping a journal or anything.  Plus, I have to keep my Mom updated so I can make it into the weekly family photo pages.

A few more items:  I flew on my first Boeing 777 today.  Those things are HUGE!!  And SUPER comfortable.  Unfortunately, we only were on that plane from Chicago to D.C. so I didn’t get to enjoy it for very long, but I did sleep that entire flight.  Also, the pilot says everything in German, and then again in English.  I can’t understand a word when he speaks German.  That is making me a little nervous.

Bis nächsten Mal!